There is a lot written and said about stress yet most of us still underestimate the effects that it has on our lives. The stress curve shows us that it can be useful in meeting deadlines, preparing for exams or dealing with sudden shocks, but chronic stress certainly has devastating effects on our health both physical and mental. It takes a toll on our relationships, often making us unavailable to those around us, keeping us busy with a multitude of tasks and never ending to-do lists which we never seem to clear. Not only that but when the stress gets unbearable we may get angry to off set the stress. For a while it seems to work, we feel we have dumped the stress by unloading onto someone close, but it is not a fix and the stress soon re-emerges followed by the anger and attack, which form a vicious cycle that cannot have a happy ending.
Stress is a “doers” issue. When we are caught in stress one of the dynamics is we think the solution is to ‘do’ something and it is only us that can sort it out. Often people who have a lot of stress have strong views about how things should be and it is their task to ensure it is that way. However, it never is that way so the stress is a result of their unflinching doing to make it “that way”.
Simply put, when we are stressed we act as if we are the ruler of the universe; we are the resident great power. Our stress comes from acting like God even when we may not believe in such an energy.
When we are stressed we shun effective teamwork; we become impossible to help and we don’t have time to goal set or prioritise all the things that reduce stress. Evidence shows it is helpful to do meditation or yoga or just take a break and go for a long walk. But when we are busy we ditch exercise and meditation when in fact we should double it.
In truth, stress is a result of our thinking and while you can turn it off for a while it will re-emerge so it is about changing the way we think about everything in our world.
When we are stressed we are unbalanced. Our doing and our being, our logic and our inspiration are out of balance; our masculine mind has totally overruled our feminine mind. It is as if we have nailed one foot to the floor and the other is goose-stepping at high speed. Not a pretty picture and the results are nearly always painful.
If we want to de-stress we need to win the balance back. Can you start valuing your feminine side, allowing the answers to come to you and resisting the urge to fix everything? Can you allow the universe to show you the way? As A Course in Miracles says, ‘resign as your own teacher and allow yourself to learn again.’ Set your goals, join your team, your family and set sail but don’t think you know what will happen or how. That is the adventure!